06 February 2010

My Quest to Learn English All Over Again

As a writer, and aspiring author, I should have an excellent grasp of English grammar. Right? I mean, I'm an umpteenth-generation American. I grew up speaking and writing the language. I ought to be fairly expert in its usage.

Unfortunately, that's just not true. I like to think I get most of it right, but it seems to occur more by intuition than by understanding. (For instance, did I need that last by? It read better that way, but I don't know why.)

Before I began writing fiction in earnest, I couldn't tell you the difference between a predicate, a pluperfect, or a past participle. (Did I need that last comma?) I still have trouble recognizing various parts of speech and remembering their proper names, but I'm getting better. The more I try to learn, however, the more I find that the rules aren't always universally agreed upon. (Ended that sentence with a preposition, didn't I? Is that wrong? Depends on who you ask.) There's no central authority for English. Even well-respected manuals of style contradict each other, and have agreed to politely disagree on certain points. (Did you catch the split infinitive?)

I've just about given up searching the Web for grammar advice. It's fairly impossible to determine which sites' authors have correct information and which are as clueless as me. For example, I ran across this little gem this morning (on a site that will remain nameless) when I did a Google search for "grammar for fiction writers". (I know. I know. The punctuation goes inside the quotes, but that's just so illogical. My search didn't include the period.) Ahem. Anyway, here's the quote:

Fiction which lacks punctuation, randomly changes tenses, misuses pronouns, lacks proper capitalization, and is littered with sentence fragments is very difficult to read.


So is non-fiction that contains improper word usage. Come on. Microsoft Word has corrected me so many times on the difference between that and which that even I know the difference now. If I can't trust a post about grammar to be grammatically correct, who can I trust?


Some would say, "Grammarians be damned! As long as the reader understands what you're saying, you've written it correctly." Others aren't happy until every comma is accounted for, and every sentenced is polished to grammatical perfection. I think I fall somewhere in the middle. How about you?

5 comments:

  1. I dunno, I just like write and stuff and punctuate like it's poetry, commas for a little stop, periods for the biggest stop, semicolons for when I'm confused and trying to pretend I'm not.

    I read a lot, so know when what I'm doing doesn't 'look right,' but that doesn't mean I stop doing it, heh. I mean, if a character is going insane and can't stop his own thoughts, I'm not going to use as many periods, even if the reader complains they had a hard time keeping up because I never stopped to let them breath. I guess that was sorta the point.

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  2. I'm in exactly the same boat. I'm at a complete loss as to where to find information. Excuse me. "Correct" information.

    I'm starting to come to the conclusion that I'm just not going to please everyone when it comes to anything about my writing. I realized long ago that my plots and stories aren't for everyone. Lately, I'm starting to see that my grammar is not for everyone either.

    That doesn't mean I'm not going to try. I will certainly try to better my grammar and language skills as a whole. I'm just going to try not to get upset or discouraged. (Like there seems to be an abundance of "I'm"s in this post, yet "I'm" going to post it anyway! Oh yes, "I'm" a rebel...)

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  3. Interesting post Paul. I like how you wrote this.

    I thank God every day that I kept my college english books. I'm going through them again, now that I'm writing fiction, so I can re-learn all the rules.

    I am stuck with the same frustration. I guess all we can do is try our best and keep learning.

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  4. I speak and write English very goodly.

    As a former English teacher, I should have excellent grammar. My first degree was in linguistics, but too many years of writing computer code degraded my skills to almost nothing.

    It heartens me to learn that I'm not the only person who retained his college grammar textbooks. I still find it fascinating to read the Little, Brown Handbook.

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